They put the dialysis port back in yesterday and dad had dialysis. He was so quiet during the entire four hours which is unusual for him. Usually, we're trying to keep him from pulling at the tubes or from trying to get up and "go home". But this time he was very still. Lisa had a friend bring her by the hospital, which was nice. I learned Jean dropped by a little after I left. I was at home when Vickie texted me to say his temperature had creeped back up and his oxygen was a tad low so they gave him some tylanol and put a oxygen mask on him.
I decided to go back to the hospital and camp out by dad's bed. He'd dose off, then moan and groan and look at me with such intensity and sadness in his eyes. He looked to be in such a state of misery. I asked the nurse to give him something for pain and she did. Then they adjusted him in the bed to make him more comfortable. He seemed more settled after that, and fell asleep almost immediately.
Tommorow I'm meeting with the Paliative Care doctor to discuss some things I'd rather never in my life have to discuss. Dad's going home for sure, it's just a matter of sending him home with hospice or paliative care. Dad's suffering. And I'm heartsick.
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